madnesss

im left with 40 days to ord. but before i get to that, i've like 2 weeks of sailings to go through. cant believe im still toiling high and low even before my ord. whats worse is that im completely clueless about my future. lots of unknowns and complications. it's like standing on a crossroad, not knowing where to head. never felt this way before, future looking so bleak and unexciting. should i get a degree first? or look for a proper desk job? or try to venture my way out this society? well well, im trying to not think about all this and enjoy for a couple of months but what's after that few months? im still down with the same problems. it feels that i dont need advices, all i need is a direction from myself. i guess it's safe to say, self-affirmation. anyway, this blog seems to be my personal aunt agony. recording all my whines and complains. enough yakking, bye.